Portable Moorhuhn Soccer

You've got the flag hanging out your window, the scarf's round your neck, the beer's in the fridge and your other half's gone out with her best friend - life can be so sweet ... But suddenly you're overcome by that feeling of powerless rage: star players with high pay cheques are crawling around the pitch as if they were being forced to do it. Managers provide unavoidable proof of their incompetence, it's plain for all to see that the referee is blind as a bat, and the television set packs up in the middle of the final ...

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